I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
