I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
where are my eyebrows?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
