K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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