What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
