haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
