We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
