Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
