So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
