he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Randomize