We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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