gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
this hospital has no fireball
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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