Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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