Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
it's great music for shaving your balls
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
