wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize