A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
