Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
