Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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