I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
