We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
