Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
do nipples grow back?
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