it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
