i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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