I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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