I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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