can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
