We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize