Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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