I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
