She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
