Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
