Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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