What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
