I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
