Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
