Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
