whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
