Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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