I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Randomize
