seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
