My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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