He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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