just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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