I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
