I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
