Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
