I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
