so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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