So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
