So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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