Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
