Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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